


The rain'll be gone in the morning

by VoidLeviathan



Series: Coffee-Stained Books - Half Life AU [5]
Category: Half-Life
Genre: Alternate Universe - Bookstore, Alternate Universe - Coffee Shops & Cafés, Anxiety Attacks, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Hurt/Comfort, Light Angst, M/M, Muteness, Thunder and Lightning
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-23
Updated: 2020-05-23
Packaged: 2021-03-02 19:35:10
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,037
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24332170
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/VoidLeviathan/pseuds/VoidLeviathan
Summary: Barney simply planned to walk Gordon home on a nice drizzly day and make his way back to Eli's after he was done. Now here he was sobbing, unaware of the predicted lightning and thunder until it was far too late to explain himself.
Relationships: Barney Calhoun & Gordon Freeman, Barney Calhoun/Gordon Freeman
Series: Coffee-Stained Books - Half Life AU [5]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1756636
Comments: 4
Kudos: 117





	The rain'll be gone in the morning

**Author's Note:**

> Any typos and other mistakes will be fixed later as I catch them. The fic was not read over by anyone else.

Barney couldn't quite decide what was worse. The crushing realization that his current crush was holding him while he cried like a baby into his arms, or the loud sounds of rain and lightning as it pounded and shook the small apartment room near two a.m.

He didn't intend for this to be the situation. Barney simply planned to walk Gordon home on a nice drizzly day and make his way back to Eli's after he was done. Now here he was sobbing, unaware of the predicted lightning and thunder until it was far too late to explain himself. Another burst of thunder with the added shake of the windows made Barney cry more. 

Gordon was hugging him tightly, blankets wrapped haphazardly around them in attempts to block out some of the sound. He wished he could just  _ tell  _ Barney he wasn't weak for being afraid of it. He sort of understood the situation himself. It wasn't like he hadn't had panic attacks so bad Kleiner had to come over just to be sure he was truly okay or anything. He hoped maybe the comfort of knowing someone was there would help in some way. By the looks of it, it had. Barney's sobs slowly became light trembles which in turn became soft snoring and the occasional jump.

He thought about what brought them to this situation. Barney just wanted to be nice and walk Gordon home in the rain. 

" _ Can't we just take your car? _ " Gordon suggested. He knew for a fact Barney had one, how else was he getting over to the university?

Barney laughed, "Funny story, that car broke down just today! Too bad right? Now I got this umbrella and it's not a very big one but I'm sure we can manage. You live a couple blocks away right?"

He was lying. It was obvious. The nervous tick of pulling at the end of his sleeve and his soft laugh gave it away completely. Who was Gordon to argue with him though?

" _ If you say so...but you have to let me hold the umbrella. _ "

Barney's face immediately lit up. "Yeah no you can totally hold it! Taller than me and all so uh- so it would probably be better if you did."

It wasn't any better.

Gordon was tall and could hold it higher, but the umbrella certainly wasn't wide enough for either of them on the way to Gordon's apartment. Barney was basically soaked and Gordon could feel the right side of his shirt completely sticking to his arm. By the time they got to the apartment, Gordon refused to let Barney leave.

" _ The storm's getting bad out there. It would be better if you stayed so you didn't get sick. _ " Gordon nervously suggested, " _ Maybe you could stay until tomorrow? I have an extra room. _ "

Barney's rational brain told him to decline. He hasn't even known Gordon for that long, anything could go wrong with staying and- "Sure! I uh- you're probably right with the whole storm thing. Maybe it won't go on for too long and I can just go home in a bit."

It went on well into the morning.

After whatever leftovers Gordon had and a few hours of TV it became obvious that Barney wouldn't be able to leave at all. He didn't want to either. As it became later the lightning and thunder picked up, booming outside louder and louder. Each shake of the windows causing Barney to jolt ever so slightly. He hoped Gordon hadn't noticed. 

This was what lead them to their current situation. Gordon was just about ready for bed when he heard whimpering coming from the guest room. At first he assumed it was Lamarr chartering away at Barney, but as he made his way into the room he found it was Barney himself completely curled up on his bed...shaking? Why was he shaking? 

Then it dawned on Gordon. Ah. Barney was having an anxiety attack and had probably been on the verge of having one since the thunder picked up. 

Barney himself couldn't breathe. Or...he could but it wasn't easy. With every attempt at an exhale the air clogged up in his chest and he sucked in again to try and loosen it. Why couldn't he breathe? It was just lighting and thunder. That wasn't even that scary. Perhaps it wasn't the lightning and thunder, but the sound that followed after them. Barney couldn't stand that sound. It reminded him of something specific but he couldn't think of what it was and that made it worse. He didn't want to be here, just wanted to curl up and- Arms?

Arms were around him. Something inaudible mumbled by his ear, he couldn't tell what it was. Just wanted to melt away and forget the entire situation. Barney coughed up a sob; somehow that helped him a little. When did he even start crying? He tried to remember but his brain wouldn't function. Whose voice was that? Come to think of it, who was holding him? He wanted to move but his body wouldn't let him. They smelled of old books, warm and comforting. 

Familiar.

Old books…?

"Gordon I-I…" he flinched again with the thunder booming outside. Gordon was going to think this was weird. So much for his chance at asking him out. He should just...just leave and go home. If only he could get his legs to work. And what was that voice? Who was talking to him?

"ᴵᵗˢ ᵒᵏᵃʸ." The voice rasped. So faint but...comforting? Very comforting. "ᴶᵘˢᵗ ᵇʳᵉᵃᵗʰᵉ ʷᶦᵗʰ ᵐᵉ ᵒᵏᵃʸˀ"

With one breath after another, slowly but surely Barney started to calm down best he could. His breathing evening out steadily and cries fading to soft whimpers until he finally fell asleep. 

This was where they were now.

Gordon comforting Barney and Barney sleeping steadily against Gordon's chest. 

There would be a lot of explaining tomorrow. A lot of awkward babble that turned to silence until one of them could fully coax the other into finally tlaking about it.

But Gordon was willing to take that risk if not for a chance to spend more time with someone he deeply cared about now 

**Author's Note:**

> This fic is slowly going to become part of a series known as "Coffeestained Books" 
> 
> An AU in which Barney is a barista at Eli Vance's coffee shop "Resonance Cafe" and Gordon is employee at Isaac Kleiner's bookstore "17 City Books"
> 
> If you'd like to talk more about it, hmu @ Pan-Crow on Tumblr! Or better yet, hlvrai-cats.


End file.
